August Joseph Lingenfelter

January 22, 2021... August Joseph Lingenfelter was born at 42 weeks weighing 8 pounds 9

ounces and measuring 21.5 inches. He changed our lives forever.

Childbirth, where the minutes feel like hours, the hours feel like days and the days feel like

decades. The 36 hours of unmedicated labor that I experienced were some of the longest

hours of my life. We only spent 36 hours in the hospital after delivery and it felt like a blink

of an eye in comparison. There is something so personal about sharing your own birth story

that I hesitate to even put it out into the world, but I found that I learned so much from reading

and listening to other women’s birth stories, so it’s only fair that I share mine for others to

learn from, or if nothing else, for you to find some entertainment.

It may be the tiredness of new motherhood or it could be the ecstasy of holding my baby,

but I feel the urgency to write all of the details of my birth story down because the emotions

of the last week of my pregnancy and birth are quickly drifting away.

August's Birth Story

I’ll start off by saying only two people other than my husband and my doula told me they believed that I could actually pull off a completely unmedicated birth. For the most part I got a lot of “you should lower your expectations” and “why don’t you wait and see how you feel.” Upon reading my birth plan (the same birth plan approved by three different midwives), the doctor who saw me at my 41-week appointment told me my expectations were too high. This doctor also told me that if I waited to induce after 41 weeks then I was putting my baby in danger and increasing the risk of c-section. After hitting 41 weeks we did everything to get the baby out...seriously, everything. Think long walks, bouncing on a birth ball, foot massages, warm baths, so SO much red raspberry leaf tea, squats, side lunges, spicy food, prenatal massages, and trips to the chiropractor. Ten days overdue, I received acupuncture for the first time which led to light contractions, but it wasn’t until the twelfth day after my due date that the real action started.

Having tried so many things, I don’t think it was one specific thing that put me into labor

but the thing that tipped the scale was using my breast pump for nipple stimulation on

Day 12. When I started contracting around 5pm, our doula and friends recommended

I go to bed and try to rest, but I was far too excited and it was not remotely close to

bedtime. I was able to sleep for about four hours that night when the contractions became

too uncomfortable for me to stay in bed. Looking back now, I wish I could have understood

how intense the contractions would be in the end so I would have found the willpower to

stay in bed and get more rest. I contracted with the help of Joe until my doula arrived

early Thursday morning when my contractions were about 9 minutes apart. My doula was

so kind in coming to my house to help me contract because at this point the contractions

were still pretty far apart and not nearly as intense as they would become. But, as this was

my first pregnancy, I had no context for how intense the contractions would be later on.

While my contractions were about 5 minutes apart, I utilized a TENS machine to help distract me from the pain. My contractions slowed to a stop midmorning on Thursday

and my doula indicated that although I had contracted for 16 hours, it may have just

been prodromal labor, which means that my labor could start and stop for days before

progressing through active labor and into the finale (the third stage of labor, pushing,

and birth). I was extremely discouraged at this point because it seemed like I had been

putting in a lot of work contracting only to have them slow way down. I was able to nap

and relax for a few hours before my contractions started again in the early afternoon and

by 4pm they were coming consistently every 5 minutes. Joe was such an amazing support

person during this time and he recommended we take a walk to see if we could help my

labor progress. By the time we had walked around the corner from our house, I had three

contractions so we decided to turn back! By 5 p.m. my contractions were consistently

3-4 minutes apart and by then our doula had come back to our house to labor with us.

We played worship music and Joe stood and slowly swayed standing face-to-face with

me as I waited for the next contraction. When I contracted I would hang my arms around

his neck and my doula would apply counter pressure to my hips. To keep the labor

progressing, we walked up and down the stairs.

I think everyone labors differently, but I personally did not realize how much I would

have to work to keep my contractions progressing. It was a constant mental battle

between wanting to stay comfortable and needing to contract in positions that were

uncomfortable, but alas progressing my labor. My plan had always been to labor as

long as possible at home so that I could stay comfortable and continue to be assisted

by my doula. By 6:30pm my contractions were 3 minutes apart and our doula was

recommending we head to the hospital. Hollywood often portrays women heading into

the hospital completely out of control on the way to the hospital, but our drive to the

hospital was not as bad as I had envisioned and my contractions actually slowed down

on the way there. One thing my doula reiterated was that everything needed to come out

before the baby was born and what she meant were the three P’s (puke, poop, pee).

This instruction was super helpful for Joe because he kept rejoicing with me later on in

labor when I would puke or poop because it all had to come out for us to meet our son!

I never in a million years thought I would see my husband so dang excited watching me

puke and poop, but I guess the excitement of our first son entering the world had him

rejoicing through all of my bodily functions. Our doula insisted that we not park close to

the front door at the hospital and that I should take the stairs to the second floor instead

of the elevator in order to keep my labor from slowing down. When we arrived to the L&D

unit at the military base hospital it was around 8pm. I declined the IV upon arrival and the

nurse told me I was 6 cm dilated, which was slightly disappointing because it still meant I

likely had quite a few hours of labor to trudge through and I was already tired having

labored for 28 hours at this point.

God's hand...

The next part of my birth story I give praise and thanks to God alone. There was a highly-recommended midwife at the clinic who I had met for my 38 week appointment. Everyone had raved about her in the military community so I had hoped to have the chance to deliver with her even though it is completely random based on who is working the day you arrive for delivery. At my 38-week appointment the midwife told me that she was going home for Christmas and then would have to self-isolate due to COVID for 10 days when she arrived back to Germany so she wouldn’t be back until nearly 2-weeks after my due date. The joke was on all of us because August decided to wait until I was two weeks overdue to arrive. Carly, the midwife others had recommended, was working the night we arrived at the hospital to have the baby! In that moment I felt like God was so clearly saying, “I love you and I see you.” Not only that, but there is only one room in the labor and delivery department at the military hospital that has a birthing tub and birth chair, which is the ideal room for an unmedicated delivery. I prayed for this room because honestly I didn’t know if I could do it without the extra tools and thankfully it was open and set up for me upon my arrival, hallelujah! After I was checked in, I was notified the tub was being filled and I went to our L&D room to get set up! Joe quickly unpacked the essential oils and diffuser, turned off the lights, and set out battery-powered tea light votives to help create an enjoyable environment for laboring. I quickly got in the tub and found being in the water much more comfortable. I stayed in the tub for two hours before Joe recommended (demanded?) I get out and try a different position. He had been texting with our doula while I labored and she ordered me out of the tub after two hours unless I was going to squat down or try other positions while in the tub.

While I had an amazing nurse and midwife, I really wish my doula had been able to assist me in the 8 hours I spent laboring and pushing at the hospital. Our doula was incredible at encouraging me to contract in uncomfortable, but effective positions, and I believe I wouldn’t have spent 5 additional hours contracting at the hospital which would have saved me some energy when it came time to push. After two hours I got out of the tub and really struggled to find another comfortable position for contractions. I attempted to sit on a birth ball, stood, leaned on the side of the tub, and even kneeled on the bed. The pain of the contractions towards the end of my labor was absolutely excruciating. I repeated no less than 100 times to Joe that I could not do it. I told him a few times that I would need an epidural and he lovingly replied that I could do it and would repeat back all of the reasons why I had decided that I did not want an epidural. If you ever, ever want to attempt an unmedicated birth, I highly recommend that you and your birthing partner be on the same page in understanding why you do not want medication so that when the time comes that you are asking for it, which you will, they can encourage you well. Towards the end of my labor, my memories start to get a little hazy due to my delirium, but Joe told me around 11pm I was checked and dilated to 8 cm and I started pushing around 1:30am on Friday morning.

Pushing was a very strange, out-of-body experience for me. It was like time was standing still and I truly believed that my baby would never come out. I kept looking around thinking, all of these people are staring at me and they are going to be really let down when the baby never comes out. Other random thoughts I had were, “ Why aren’t we listening to music, that might help get me pumped up to push?!” and “I need music to motivate me, but all I have is my running playlist and I don’t know which song to pick,” and “I wish I could just get all my poop out at once instead of dropping little rabbit turds every time I push,” and “Should we listen to Taylor Swift’s song Bad Blood? But, there’s about to be a lot of blood, so that might be too ironic” and “we should listen to Beyoncé.” I stopped being able to feel contractions when I started pushing so I couldn’t tell when to “breathe in and bear down in my butt” like my midwife kept telling me, so I just would occasionally breathe in and try and see if I felt enough in my butt to start pushing. Luckily none of my irrational thoughts were true, because I did in fact push out my baby. Looking back if I had been more mentally prepared for pushing, I probably could have moved him down more efficiently and not torn in the end, but, by the time I was sitting on the birthing stool over two hours into pushing, I became really impatient and decided I was just going to push and push and push even though it felt like a bowling ball was coming out of me, he came rushing out. My midwife did a few things in the end that helped me navigate the last few pushes. First, while he was in my vaginal canal, the nurse asked if she could check and see how he moved down while I pushed to make sure he was in fact moving down. Second, when he was about an inch away from crowning, she asked if I wanted to reach down and feel his head. I’ll never forget getting to touch his head and knowing I was so close to meeting him. Joe called me his hero while I pushed and I’ve never felt greater love for him. There is something so amazing about laboring for 36 hours with your partner. I never once felt like I was doing it alone or like it was only my pain to bear. He had such an empathetic understanding of what I was enduring to bring our child into the world and he attempted to do everything he could to help comfort and support me even when I couldn’t communicate the words to tell him how. He walked with me, danced with me, encouraged me and helped me to believe I could do it even when I truly believed I couldn’t.

At 3:36 a.m. our beautiful baby boy, August Joseph, came rushing into the world caught

by his dad, while I sat in a supported squat position in the birth chair. My water broke as

he exited and there was a tidal wave of fluid that hit the floor. His cord was wrapped around

his neck and the midwife helped to navigate the cord and I pulled him close to my chest.

With the help of the nursing staff, I waddled over to the bed, holding the baby and cuddling

with him. My placenta came out quickly after and the midwife confirmed that there was

absolutely no deterioration which was a concern from him being two weeks late.

I had a second-degree tear which the midwife did use lidocaine to stitch, thank goodness!

August had meconium stuck in his airway after birth so he was taken from me to be checked

after he was born and brought back once they confirmed his airways were cleared.

As I think back on what I learned through this life changing experience, I would make only a few

minor changes. I would utilize the TENS machine more effectively. The device has a lot of power to help and distract you through the pain of each contraction and I was using it on one of the lowest settings for most of my labor. I would prepare different playlist options based on my mood and play music when laboring in the hospital. I had always envisioned myself listening to music throughout my entire labor and delivery, but for some reason when we arrived at the hospital I never thought about turning any on until it was time to push and by then I was worried about ruining the mood. I would prepare more mentally with positive affirmations. My headspace was extremely negative in the last few hours of my labor and I wish I had practiced meditating on encouraging scripture to help distract me from my negativity. I would contract in more uncomfortable positions to get labor progressing more quickly. My energy level was low by the end of the delivery and it was difficult for me to stand by the end which would have been a more ideal position to push in because it would have reduced the likelihood of tearing. I would read more about preparing for pushing and positions to encourage the baby to move down more quickly.

I am extremely thankful that my labor went smoothly and I, through the help of my husband,

doula, midwife, nurses and friends, was able to achieve the birth that I had planned and

prepared for. I am even more extremely thankful for a beautiful, healthy baby boy.

Xo, Theresa

Here's an inside glimpse of our episode on House Hunters International!

As many of you now know, Joe and I recently made our TV debut on House Hunters International! The whole experience has been incredibly surreal. I was contacted by a casting office for HGTV’s House Hunters International asking if we would be interested in shooting with the show, they had found me on Instagram! If you haven’t heard of House Hunters, you obviously haven't ever been bored on a Southwest flight, but the basis of the show is that you move abroad and then the show helps you find your perfect place in your new city! First of all, I can’t say instagram never did anything for me, because I was found completely through moving hashtags by the casting office and I am sure many of you are now reading this post thanks to Instagram connecting us!

I’ve had so many questions from friends and family since the show aired about a week ago, so I wanted to give you a glimpse into the behind the scenes of the show! If you haven’t had a chance to watch the show, we are Season 160, Episode 4 and you can watch on this link, House Hunters International.

On the first day of shooting, we were super nervous and had no idea what to expect. Joe joked about needing a makeup artist, which the show does NOT provide for the record, and in all reality I was the one who ended up powdering both of our noses.

We arrived at the first meeting location where we sat for our interviews. There were 4 team members total in the crew; the director, the audio guy, the camera guy, and the fixer (basically the guy doing all the running around and speaking German for us). The following day, we met our real estate agent. Over five days, we spent about 40-50 hours shooting for the show. That means for our 23 minute and 55 second episode, A LOT of things were not included in the episode. The director had all kinds of crazy ideas like doing a segment of me making homemade tie dye to show to my trendy followers on the blog or surprising Mr. Sparkle (Joe) with a sequined shirt and catching his reaction on film. We ended up not having time to do many of those ideas, but even some of the things we did have time to shoot, didn’t end up on the show.

Because there is no great way to answer all of your questions, I’ve compiled some of the most common ones, but feel free to leave additional questions in the comments!

For the record, we keep the cats on the top floor of our house where they have three rooms and plenty of space to run around. Fuzzy, our blind cat, is not able to safely navigate the stairs and the other cat, Fatty, can navigate the barrier to come down the stairs if she wishes.

Baby Lingenfelter Coming Soon!

We are BEYOND excited to share with you that we will be welcoming a baby into the world in January 2021. Maybe you didn't notice, but I have been a little quiet around here and it's because I absolutely hate keeping secrets and so the safest bet was to keep quiet. Not only that, but those first trimester naps really kept me from doing anything productive. This baby factory is TIRED. I cannot wait to share with you all the ins and outs of having my first baby in a foreign country and my favorite ways to style a growing bump! Stay tuned for a more detailed story on our path to getting pregnant (it's a story for another time- mostly because I need to stay awake long enough to write it.) But, in the meantime, know that we are so incredibly excited to be blessed by this baby and we are over the moon to become parents (Joe cries on the daily because he is so happy.)

PS- Feel free to send this first time momma, ALL of your tips and tricks!

Xo,

Theresa

Easy Tortilla Soup

Cooking with T.S.E

I’ve been trying a lot of new recipes since we are home more. By more, I mean I don’t ever remember us being in our house for this length of time in our 7 years of marriage. While I typically cook at least 3-4 nights a week in our normal life, staying at home for this period of time has really had me searching for new recipes to try. We still aren't very familiar with the German takeout restaurants in the area so that has left me preparing food for every meal for the last 6 weeks. My husband and I are not picky, we will literally eat anything, but we definitely have a taste for yummy food. Now, there are plenty of recipes I’ve tried and won’t make again. Whether it’s the amount of weird ingredients, the difficulty or length of time it takes to prepare, or the overall taste, there are some recipes you try and you think, "That was fine, but I don't need to do that again."

Out of the last 5 new recipes I’ve tried, this is the ONLY one I will be adding to our rotation. The last one to be added to the rotation was green enchiladas and my husband literally asks for enchiladas as soon as the leftover enchiladas have left the fridge. We could probably eat Mexican every day of the week, so I love that this soup is Mexican flavor but something different than enchiladas or taco salad. Here is the best part of the recipe, it is EASY. My husband is quite possibly one of the worst cooks in the world (so much so that if I died I think he would starve). He watched me make this and even HE said he could do it. That’s where the “easy” part of the name comes in. It’s so easy my husband could do it.

Scroll to the bottom for the recipe card!

The prep for this recipe is pretty much as easy as it gets. But, first let’s talk about some tips and

ways you can make it your own! First and most importantly is the beer. In my opinion, you get bonus points if you use German beer because then it’s like German-Mexican Soup and that’s just silly to me. Ok, but for realz you can use whatever type of beer you have on hand (I probably wouldn't use one with too much flavor). Next, a personal secret of mine is the lime tortilla chips. I think the lime brings a much better flavor than regular tortilla chips when you crumble them as your topping. I also use them to top off my Mexican salad!

Next tip is in regards to the Rotel. If you like your tortilla with a little bit of kick, then substitute a can of hot Rotel instead of original. If you want it with less heat then use two cans of the mild. You can really change this up to your personal heat preference! Also keep in mind, outside of the Rotel, you can really use any brand, these are just what I found at the commissary here in Germany.

Ok, so here is the hardest part! Chop the onion. You will literally be crying with tears of joy for how easy this recipe is, or maybe it's just the onion? JOKING! Please excuse my corny jokes and grab that can of corn. That's the last one, I promise. Drain your corn and black beans. Put everything except the cheese and tortilla chips in your crock pot (leave out the avocado and cilantro too). My favorite part of this recipe is that I don't have to do any preparing with the chicken. You just literally put your raw chicken breast in the crockpot with everything else and press go!

Don't forget to sprinkle everything with a package of taco seasoning (you can also choose a spicier version here to add more heat!). I mix everything up in the crockpot and it should look like your chicken is in a Mexican bubble bath (shown below).

Cook in the crockpot on low for 8 hours or on high for 4 hours. I absolutely love getting to the end of the day and not having to worry about what is for dinner when I have something in the crockpot. ALL HAIL to the crockpot. When your time is up on the crockpot, pull out the chicken and shred. Then put it back in and stir it up! It's that easy!

I serve my Easy Tortilla Soup with cornbread, and you can add a yummy mojito or marg to make it a whole experience! Enjoy and drop me a comment if you decide to make it!! I would love to hear how it goes!

XO,

Theresa

First 15 Books of 2020

I love books and I have always loved reading. Reading has been a beautiful escape in a lonely time. If you've read my other posts, than you know that I bought A LOT of books to read when I finished business school at the end of 2018. This picture shows you all of the books that I bought and had plans to read! While I love reading a physical book, I have found that when traveling and reading in bed after my husband goes to bed, it is way easier to read on the kindle app on my phone or listen to an audio book rented through the library. So, while I have this incredible stack of books to read, I am shocked to say that out of the 15 books I finished in the first three months of the year, I only read ONE physical book... say what?! If you are like my former self, you are going to be like, OK Theresa, I do NOT have time to read that many books. I hear you and that's exactly why I am writing this recap! I will give you the full list of the books I read and give you my top 3 to add to your list!

At the beginning of March, I decided I was going to read all of the books that had ever been on Reese Witherspoon's Book Club Picks. As I write this in April 2020, there are currently 35 books on the list and I have finished 10. Maybe you are a big fan of Reese too and are wondering how my suggestions will differ if that's all I am reading?! Not to worry! While I do hope to finish the list as soon as possible, I am also a member of two different book clubs and can be persuaded pretty easily to add new books to my reading list, so my favorites and recommendations will certainly be different.

**Something to Note** As I share with you my preferred books in this post and future posts, I promise to always share with you in what form of media I read the book. Personally, I do not feel like there is a wrong way to read a book, but I know some people have preferences! I do a mix of reading on my kindle and listening to audio books (I use the Overdrive app with a library membership so that I don’t go bankrupt buying books) and occasionally I read a physical book. While I won’t judge you for how you choose to consume a book, I personally think the form of media you choose to read a book can completely change your experience with the book. I will always tell you in what form I read the book and also whether I feel like it helped or hurt my personal experience.

Ok, without further ado!!

Here are the first 15 books I read in 2020

Top 3 List (in no particular order)

Daisy Jones & The Six by Taylor Jenkins Reid

This book has been on my must read list for a LONG time (pretty much since it came out) but for some reason it kept getting moved down the list. When I committed to reading Reese’s book list, I finally decided to read it and I am sure glad I did! It is also important to note that this is the only book from Reese’s list that made it to my top 3. I actually listened to the audio version of this book and I think it really enhanced my experience. The characters in the book all have different voices in the audio version and it really brought the book to life! The format of this book is different than most as it reads like an interview which had me thinking multiple times throughout the book that I was listening to real people!

A Woman is No Man by Etaf Rum

It may be a fiction novel, but this book helped me learn so much about being an immigrant in the U.S. and about the experience in a conservative Arab marriage. The book bounce’s back and forth between the voice of Deya living in modern day Brooklyn and her mother who moved from Palestine to America as a teenager for marriage. It was incredibly thought provoking and I highly recommend it! (Read this book on my kindle app)

Hyperbole and a Half by Allie Brosh

I am definitely late to the part with this book because the author, Allie Brosh released this book in 2013 and has kind of fallen off the map since then. Regardless, I found this book extremely entertaining. I read this book on the Kindle app on my phone and because the author illustrates most of her stories with hilarious comics, I recommend you read the physical book version if you plan to read it. There are a bunch of stories in the book about the author’s dogs and if you are a pet owner, I think you will get a good chuckle from this book.

Honorable Mentions

I gave ALL of the books I read over the last 90 days at least 3 stars so if you are an avid reader, go for it, read them all. But, I will add that there were quite a few that I gave 4 stars. These three books deserve an honorable mention because I really enjoyed them too!